iTunes Top 5 Review (09.02.14)

Every week  (on a Sunday) I’m going to review the top 5 songs on the iTunes (Australia) charts for no reason other than to express my opinions on popular music. No, I am not “indie”, and I don’t give a damn if something is “mainstream”. I simply have views that no one cares about, so I’m shoving them down your throats… enjoy the rant!

**I’ll be using hashtags AS hashtags, as in to signify a number, not as a silly social media tool.
#blog#music#rant#yoloswiggityswag#belieber#wecan’tstop#hashtag

#1 “Happy” – Pharrell Williams:

One minute into this song I was thinking; “hey, the universe has started me off easy, this song’s actually not too bad”. But then the next 2 minutes and 52 seconds happened. It’s not that the second part of the song is worse… it’s actually EXACTLY the same, and there we have the issue. This song is sooooooo boring. You know it’s bad when even the Minions from the Despicable Me movies can’t cheer you up with their antics during the music video. Musically, this song is the same from start to finish. The same basic beat throughout the track makes it hard to distinguish verse from bridge from chorus. What makes them distinguishable is that the chorus repeats SIX times! The song’s one redeeming quality is Williams himself. His smooth voice almost saves to track. But almost doesn’t cut it here.

3.5/10

#2 “Say Something” – A Great Big World & Christina Aguilera

The feels, oh so many feels! Simplicity and beautiful harmonies make this track a heartbreaker, much like me in my teenage years. The somewhat awkward voice of lead vocalist Ian Axel and Christina Aguilera’s real emotion work to bring out an unusually powerful entry compared to other recent chart-toppers. However, the song somehow manages to turn strength into weakness, as the track remains overly simple throughout. Add in the disjointed, repeated lyrics, and the song loses its power. Still, a strong track that deserves its spot in the top 10.

6/10

#3 “All of Me” – John Legend

Song Writer 1: Man, I don’t know what to write for this John Legend chorus.

Song Writer 2: Hmm, why don’t you just use a bunch of random contradictions? It works for me.

Song Writer 1: That’s incredible! Thanks Political Promise Man!

Another piano driven ballad succumbs to lazy writing. With such a beautiful voice, John Legend deserves to be at #3. The song isn’t bad, it’s just a big “meh” for the most part. Some more complex lyrics than stringing together random opposites like ‘end & beginning’ or ‘perfect imperfections’ might have gone a long way in improving this track. (By the way, Political Promise Man would make for a decent addition to the Avengers)

6/10

#4 “Free” – Rudimental ft. Emile Sande

Judging by this track, Rudimental consists of a guy who’s really good at palm muting guitars and someone who knows how the base-drum works… so yay them. What I guess is supposed to be an uplifting track of sorts falls miles short. Lyrics that could be generally describing the life of any Joe Shmoe out there fail to hit home, and the song is easily forgettable despite Sande’s mumbling efforts.

4/10

#5 Addicted to You – Avicii

Hey, at least it’s not another country/house track, am I right? No one? Okay… But seriously, this song totally took me by surprise. Not only did I not hate it as much as I usually do Avicii songs, I actually quite enjoyed it. The uncredited vocalist, Audra Mae, carries the track with her powerful voice, giving of an almost ‘Adele’ vibe. The lyrics aren’t as simple as they first seem, although it is still an Avicii track so it does stay on the generic side of things. But overall, the song is as enjoyable as house, or EDM, or whatever you want to call it gets.

6.5/10

<Josh>

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